I hate flap books.
You know those cute little board books with hidden flaps that kids can lift up and find some magical picture underneath which encourage discovery and curiosity? I can’t STAND them. I want to turn the page, read the words, and move on. I do not, repeat, do NOT want to look under every single flap on the page, multiple times, and feign excitement or joy. In fact, it is all I can do to not throw the book across the room and scream “Look, the flaps flew away!!”
I’m not proud of this, but I felt the need to share.
I also really don’t like bath time. I think it is a combination of fear of drowning and/or serious head trauma compounded with the sheer volume that can be reached in the perfect echo-structure of our all-tiled bathroom. Why would you tile walls, it just makes it louder? When I design my perfect house I think I will carpet the walls of my bathroom so it will be a quiet and safe place to retreat. Of course in my perfect home there will be no bath times with preschoolers, everyone will take showers like civilized adults, so it may be a moot point.
I feel bad about these things and wonder if it is a black mark on my Mommy Report Card.
There are some truly disgusting parts of parenthood that don’t get to me. I can handle poopy diapers. (Though in the spirit of complete disclosure, I throw out all underwear that has poop on it. There is no way I am washing that with my laundry; or worse, washing it out in my sink where I will be forced to touch the poop. Not happening). I am the designated “vomit girl” in the house as Dave tends to join the festivities if forced to be around, clean up, or even think about vomit.
But put me in a tiled room with slippery preschoolers, echoing walls, and flap books and I am ready to throw in the towel.
And as we say repeatedly in our house, “towels don’t belong **in** the bathtub”.
Meg Jeske said,
March 3, 2009 at 4:55 am
I am not fond of them either. As a kid we had one that I loved, called Lamont the Lonely Monster. But as a Momo, flap books are annoying. Q tears all the flaps off, which defeats the whole purpose anyway.
I have to say I don’t miss swishing poop in the toilet from our cloth diaper days. We have mostly switched to disposable, which is just fine by me.
And it’s true, towels don’t belong in the bathtub. A good rule to live by.
Try not to worry about the Mommy Report Card too much. (easier said than done, I know!)
I love you!
Grannie said,
March 13, 2009 at 10:29 pm
When you were born we bought two dozen diapers…that was it until you were potty trained. I spent a lot of time washing poopy diapers. One of my greatest joys with your boys has been that there are no diapers to scrub when I change them! I am so glad for modern technology. Except for tile, perhaps. I really see no need for that at all, anywhere.
Grannie will NEVER send another book with flaps, I promise!